Friday, July 25, 2008

A special day

A few weeks back, on one of our mornings out together, the man of the house and I ventured into the Oxfam Shop, which by the way, is a favourite haunt of mine. Everything in there is simply beautiful. You can often find me hovering and salivating over the musical instruments. As I was looking around at the displays of carved wooden boxes, I spied this book:
I thought, hey what a cool looking book. I figured the bubster would really love this, if not now, in a few years. I also really like the DK company's bright photographic presentation. So with a smile on my face, I picked it up to start leafing through. It starts with the Americas, then goes to Africa, Europe, Asia, and Australasia. I loved it!

As I handled the cover, the book fell open to this page:

Take a good look at it. Click on it if you want to see it bigger. See the blond boy? He's ten years old. His name is Søren. He loves riding his bike to school, playing football and guitar.

I don't often cry really. I just don't. I used to cry a lot. But now, I sometimes feel as though I've cried all the tears that have been allotted to me. I'm dried up. But seeing this blond boy.......well. At first I was startled, then amazed. I stood there going huh.... huh..... over and over. Then I felt that familiar downward spiral and it hit me like a wave. Out of no where sprang this fountain of tears and I just quietly sobbed and sobbed, right there in the Oxfam shop. "Look. Look...." I'm not a pretty, delicate crier, dabbing at my watery eyes with a hand embroidered hankie. My face gets all red and twisted and snot pours from my nose. I'm not noisy though. Just how it is I guess.

I announced, "We have to get this book." I then took a deep breath, marched up to the counter, wet, red face and all and stammered, "I'll take this." The attendant didn't say a thing, just rang me up and out we went.

Our Søren turned 9 years old today. Today is his birthday. I have no idea what 9 looks like. Now I do. It's only one year less than 10 so it must be similar. I will certainly know what 10 looks like next year. But I think it must be very close. I always expected our Søren to be the patient, thoughtful type - he just seemed that way to me. He'd have to be, with the bubster trailing his every move. My god, wouldn't he just have worshiped him.....

Happy 9th Birthday, Søren Dennehy. We bought a tree for you today. The bubster picked out a cake for you at the shops. Although he wanted to eat it right away, we persuaded him that it would taste better after dinner. We lit the candles, sang happy birthday and pulled the poppers. Thank you for letting us see what 9 looks like.

You may visit this post from last year's birthday to see some funny vintage photos.

9 comments:

buddha_girl said...

Here by way of Kerrie.

I cried with you as I read your experience in the bookstore. I don't make cakes on a regular basis and have bought two in the past 10 years. That's it.

Ironically, I bought one earlier today while shopping in a new store with my son, Buddha. He chose a most outlandish cake with loads of buttercream frosting. For some reason, I had no nagging thoughts of calories, fat, sugar, and the like. I merely smiled and said, "Of course! Excellent choice!"

We will serve some this evening with you and Soren in mind. Happy birthday to your beautiful boy.

Kerrie said...

Oh Karin Honey...

What an amazingly bittersweet moment. That page made my heart stop. It's a perfect Soren birthday gift for this year.

Wishing life were different, wishing your kind, patient boy were here for Magnus to follow...imagine the adoration..!!!

Sending all my love...((((hugs))))

Theo said...

Karin,

Sending hugs to you on Soren's 9th birthday. The photo in the book took my breath away--I can only imagine how you must have felt when you opened it up and saw that beautiful blonde boy. Happy Birthday Soren!

Thinking of you tonight--

Love,
Karla

Tracy, mom2many said...

wow. just don't even have words. Missing Soren with you. I'm amazed with the gift, it's just perfect.

Leah said...

grHappy 9th Birthday Soren!
Karin, what a moment for you. I can just 'see' your experience and feel my heart stop for that split second. Wishing things were so different for you. Much love, Leah x*

kate said...

Happy 9th Birthday Soren...thinking of you.

Lissy said...

Wow Karin. What a "find". (I love those DK books!!) I did a double take to see that picture too. Glad you were able to do the big "UGLY CRY" in the shop...I'm surprised the shop worker didn't say anything - even a simple "Are you OK?" Amazing...

I spoke to someone this week who didn't know we had lost Max & Lucy...I'm always blown away by someone that I thought would have known (I was a teacher at her children's school & it was in the school newsletter)...I realise that my life isn't the center of the universe & not everyone knows my history...she sent me a song & the lady singing it had given birth to a son who was born too early & called him Max! Took my breath away...

ANYWAY, wanted to leave you some ((((hugs))))) here. (It wasn't meant to turn into MY Blog!!!)

Much much love as you remember Soren. I know he would be an amazing child. Perhaps he would be in a DK book???

Lis

Dr. Joanne Cacciatore said...

(((((((((((Karin))))))))))

Søren at 9. I cannot imagine it has been that long. I try to picture him in my mind's eye, and I can see the beautiful eyes of his little brother, Magnus. If only wishes were fishes...

Holding you both in my heart during this time...

R said...

Wow...thinking of you. I can't believe how great it is when our children give us such awesome signs!

Rhonda
Casey's mom